Hair

Posted on | September 5, 2006 | No Comments

I liked having a shaved head. Saving time and money appealed to me. My shaved head explained, without any kind of verbal discussion,  my preference in being an oddity bobbing about in a sea of homogenization (although it could be argued that as a weirdo outsider, I am still a part of a group of similar beings). There aren’t many women in their late twenties that shave their head. But I felt liberated by my pale scalp peppered with the dark remnants of my one vanity. I remember the confusion in the voices of my sister and my mother when I told them of my deed. They probably wrote it off as another one of Erica’s little quirky explorations. The hair grows back swiftly, and I have passed beyond the short powder-puff stage. For the first time in over a year, I am growing it back out. Why? Laziness. Vanity. A longing for funky braids. As painful as it is for me to admit, I miss my dark locks. My hair is beautiful. That fact is one of the few certainties I hold for truth about myself. Dark, thick, wavy, plentiful – it’s the kind of hair seen in shampoo commercials. Long ago, I cut it off. At that point, it was down to my waist. I was proud of it. I cut it to mourn the loss of a dear friend, and had a hard time growing it long after that. Yes, it got down to my shoulders once or twice, but I cut it again after a disaster with hair dye or to remedy a funky haircut. I am years away from long hair. The struggle from shaved nearly bald to locks is a long time coming. Today, for the first time in over a year, I put barrettes in my hair. The growing out process can be quite traumatizing. Offers made to cut my hair (by stylists, not just random people on the street) tantalize me, but I want to do this alone. Headbands and funky scarves covered up the mess initially. Now my hair is long enough to twist into a barrette or two. I know, this is not world news or even an event that warrants comments in your life. But, this morning, it made me happy. And that is all that really matters.

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