I have a mental illness. I am manic depressive. And when it comes to coverage by my insurance company, if I have a full-on breakdown and require hospitalization, I will get only 10 days of paid in-facility treatment in my lifetime. Ten days, kids. When I had a staph infection, I was in the hospital for a week. That was just an infection. Manic-depression can’t be treated with antibiotics. No I.V. will make it all better. For me, it’s a constant - meds every night before I go to bed. If I get another infection, I will be allowed to go back to the hospital for treatment - no questions asked. Why? Because it could be life threatening. What many people don’t realize is that manic-depression is also life threatening when it is at its worst. I have scars on my arms to prove how bad it can be.

A lot of this treatment is my responsibility, but what of the responsibility of the insurance companies? If I pay for insurance, why is a mental medical issue any different from something like diabetes? Both require daily care in order to maintain balance in everyday life. Broken legs, cancer, severe infections, pulled muscles — all covered without question. Actually, if you have cancer, they can ding you if you change insurance companies. A “pre-existing condition” and all of that. I hate the insurance industry.

And what will happen when I lose my insurance? It will cost me $500.00 to pay for both my Lamictal and my Seroquel. D and I are not thrifty, don’t save nearly enough for a rainy day, but that kind money will be a huge burden to us. As of now, I pay 40 bucks a month for both medications. I have no problem paying that - it’s reasonable. But 500? JesusHFuckingChrist!

What’s more affordable - being crazy or being sane? That’s a question I have to ask myself.