From the Corner
Posted on | May 19, 2004 | No Comments
I couldn’t really hear his first comment over the throaty rumbling of the semi behind me, but his malicious gaze was compelling enough for me to rev the engine of the scooter…hoping to scare him off with Maru’s underwhelming roar…
“You gotta dime to spare?” He looked at me from behind dirty lashes. Cheeks stained gray, probably from the exhaust of the passing cars which hurried on their way to lives that didn’t involve street corners and panhandling.
I shook my head, “Sorry, I don’t” I said, hoping my turned away gaze was enough to compel him to move on.
“That’s okay, keep that fat pussy on that little blue thing, then.” It took me a moment to realize what he was saying. I didn’t know if he was calling me fat, or if he was insulting me because I wouldn’t give him any cash. Then I wondered if he understood that I was on the back of a scooter on Michigan, not exactly the prime place to dig my wallet out. What if the light turned green? What if I had to suddenly accelerate to get out of someone’s way? I wouldn’t be able to do shit with both hands in my bag.
He glared at me as he walked past, right behind me. The light turned green but as I accelerated I could see his disdain in my shiny mirrors.
He was there again today, slinking through the traffic, asking for a hand out. He must have seen the police cruiser before I did, because without a second glance, he hauled it down OBT, to bother another intersection.
I am usually one to give, even if its a little. But the aura of this guy threw me off. No more than twenty-five, he seemed defeated and angry, like I owed him something because I was riding and he was walking. But what he didn’t understand, and probably wouldn’t even if I explained it to him, was that I had walked for years. Sometimes closer to the gutter, but I’m not a gutter walker anymore. There comes a time in everyone’s life (I believe) when they make a choice – to fail or not to fail. It’s a simple matter of motivation. I think that with the proper drive, you can get anywhere. That’s how I made it out of the shady streets and into a warm home. I know I’m lucky. I have family and friends that will help me out if the need arises. Maybe he doesn’t have that. Maybe he doesn’t want it. Anger does terrible things to lives. Such destruction that can be relieved by just letting go. But I learned that after years of searching.
I hope someone gives him a dime. More so, I hope he can find his way home.
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