A Little System
Posted on | June 6, 2004 | 2 Comments
What do you do when someone you liked turns into someone you don’t like, and ends up happier than when they were in your life?
You smile and feel warm fuzzies for them, I guess. I was involved in the situation only as a sidenote. I introduced them. They dated. She and I bonded and then came the best friend on whom she had really set her desires. I painted her in deceptive and malicious colors, but she may not have been that streaked with intent. Instead a bad situation got worse, friendships exploded into nothing and we all walked away clutching our tummies, trying to figure out what in the hell happened.
So, that was two years ago. Her original beau and I are really no longer friends. I felt like shit when I she closed the door on him. He was a friend. I loved him as such. I hated to see him hurt. But I also see that he may have blown it out of proportion a bit. He did the same before. So, he is off in a distant casa in Orlando, living his life with his new woman. The former friend is off, still with the ex best friend, and seems to be doing well.
Where do I fit into all this now? No where. I don’t think I would have the heart to apoligize for being a bitch to her. For some reason the maturity thing has not extended to humble moments of contrition, but I’m working on it.
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June 7th, 2004 @ 5:58 am
With one there could be hope to regain what was lost, but in all honesty I am not the same person I was when we were friends. Instead I think I will send happy thoughts from afar.
Just being happy for someone’s success is fine with me.
The bitch part – well I tend to think I am justified when I come down hard on people. But the problem was I was trying to protect the friend, and she hurt him. It wasn’t my place to judge, but it did it anyway. Yeah, dumb me. But I learned from that.
June 7th, 2004 @ 12:28 am
I suppose the question is, were you a bitch for the right reason (at the time) or were you a bitch just to be a bitch?
the friendship may have stalled… but if it was true to begin with a simple “hey i was a jerk sorry bout that” should suffice. no grand appologies should be necessary….
of course i dont know the situation or what happened but, seems to me you can still salvage what was there with at least one of them. that way its not a total loss. maybe send them a card to say hey glad you are so happy now. that way it puts the ball in their court and lets them contact you. Unless that is truly not desired. in that case you can just be happy for them, and get on with life….