Moody Meow

What in the hell is a “woman-thing” supposed to sound like? Gawd!! Some of the things I hear at work make me want to run away screaming. And have you ever noticed that some voices just piss you off? There are two here that annoy the shit out of me. I turn up my iPod a little louder when I hear them. And one of the voices I hate just said the “woman-thing.” Is it Friday yet?

This is a work post, but I am annoyed, not railing at the injustices of my job, so it’s not protected.

We are having this lunch thing on Friday for the whole department. It’s mean to rouse the troops and bring a feeling of unity and ….well… it’s crap. We are having BBQ, which I didn’t eat when I was a meat-eater. There’s nothing for me, so I have to bring my own veggie burger and baked potato so that I can actually have lunch.

Then they have a theme - Jimmy Buffet. I don’t know how a singer is a theme (the Grateful Dead come to mind. but they were iconic and I don’t think Buffet is) but apparently someone thought it was a good idea to get a bunch of country boys into hawiian shirts. The idea is laughable. The worst part? They somehow figured out how to blast the music over the intercom. My poor ears are being assulted by “Cheeseburger in Paradise” and all that other crap he sings. No matter how I blast Cocteau Twins, I hear his whiney, watery voice creeping through my sonic shield.

I hate Jimmy Buffet.

Most of my posts about work are going to be protected. If you want the password, just e-mail me. It’s the same one as before, but I understand if you can’t remember.

And it’s freaking cold in here!

Someone just farted as they walked by my desk.
I think I am going to be ill.

I woke up the first time about 2. Valentine’s body heat made me sweat beneath my blankets, and he refused to move from his perch behind my knees. I managed to dislodge him after a few tries, but the tenacious bastard kept jumping right back onto the bed, looking for a comfortable and fluffy place to rest. I never got back to sleep. I swirled around beneath my blankets so as to find that one spot to make my mind rest, but it never came. My blankets are loud in that kind of pre-morning quiet. I’ve heard thunder with less offensive rumbles. Added to that, Val and I battling for supremacy over the bed (kicked him off me more than 6 times) and I realized I wouldn’t get to sleep again. David’s inconsistent breathing reminded me that although my night was now ruined, I shouldn’t intrude upon his dreams. My thunderous blanket, co-dependant cat, and I went to the living room to try to find a good place to rustle and turn.

I meant to run this morning. I woke easily every half hour after 2:30, turning over the work of Van Eyck in my head when my brain was fully engaged. We went over some of his works last night in class. It’s really not as odd as it seems. I told D to put the pups back to bed, and we would all sleep until 6. I woke at 5:15, 5:22 (cat once again jumping on my blankets), 5:47 (truck roaring down the street, to squeal at the speed hump - truly offensive breaks) and then at 6:33. Those three offensive numbers blinked at me from the cable box. My morning just went to shit.

I did manage to brush my teeth, put on very wrinkled cloths (which were all clean) and slap on some deodorant. David chased me around the kitchen with the syrup for my waffles, trying to make me remember my breakfast and then warned me against speeding too much because I still “had time” to get to work. I didn’t listen. I got mad at an idiot in a Mustang and we played “fuck you” throughout the morning traffic. I was more than a little amused when we both ended up on the exit for John Young Parkway, going in opposite directions. I flicked him off as I made my left.

So, no shower, no face wash, no run, no sleep, no concentration, no joy for today. But I am taking tomorrow AND Friday off because I need the break and I won’t be able to take any days off for a month or so One of our other admins is going to have surgery, so I am going to take the time off while I can. And you know what? I deserve it.

But all I want out of today is a shower.
Considering the morning I just had, I’m not really in a bad mood. I am beyond tired but I am really glad that David reminded me about my waffles and there was just enough coffee in the pot for me to get my caffiene fix. That’s something.

I hope you had a happy shower, where ever you are…….a long, hot, steamy happy shower.

Salad, breadsticks, pasta with marinara and iced tea. Yeah, I’m a happy camper.

And the company was enjoyable.
Good lunch…. now back to work!

I don’t know what time it was when I first woke. I heard, what I thought to be, a cat playing with a bug. I realized as the dogs perked up and jingled curiously that while the sound was coming from inside the closet, it was also coming from inside the wall. The up-down curiousity of the dogs went on all all night. Who can blame them, really? They are bred to hunt, and they wanted a peice of what ever creature lives beneath my tub. So, we have lovely neighbors that live downstairs beneath the our home. I don’t know how I feel about this. I know that there are rats about. We’ve seen them dining in my birdfeeder, long, thin tail hanging down like a ribbon. I don’t mind rats, personally. I think they are cute, and although I know their fleas spread disease (correct me if I am wrong) I think they of them just as a part of the Nature of my household. As long as my four-legged family are out of harm’s way - I see no need to interfere. Although, the dogs “hunting” what ever lives there at all hours of the night will get old quiten fast.

Today is the last day I get to keep my window at work. I’ve taken comfort in watching the pigeon family fetch moss and bits of grass for nest. And the squirrles dance around the tree every morning, their tails like a flag hailing the busy traffic of dawn. I will miss my window. I’ve got to take my ivey plant home today (not named…I need to fix that) and repot it. There’s not enough sunlight at my new desk to warrant a live plant. I need a squirrel cam for my birdfeeder. I’m sure I would see lots of fun acrobatics.

On that note I am going to overmedicate myself so that my face stops hurting. I’ve been under the weather all week, and I feel it in my bones. I need to run. I want to run, but pulling even a walk out of what little energy I do possess is impossible. I will try to do it tonight.

I want this bean bag Of course , I want the red one. Don’t they look comfy?

gapingvoid: how to be creative (long version) This is great. I’ve read some of these tips in books and such (or something similar), but this is a great list. I’ve printed it out and put it on my desk at work.

A simple prescription for keeping Google’s records out of government hands. By Tim Wu Good article.

Green Loop A happy shop. I’m always eager to share my eco-happy shops. Although I spend very little in the way of them myself, but mainly because I suffer from overwhelming buyer’s remorse and usually can’t stand to buy anything for myself. I need to get over that.

New York Hack This is a fantastic blog about a woman NYC cab driver. I think you can rework all of hour frustrations into a Florida experience. Well, except for the cabs. We just don’t have that many cabs here…. ::: sigh :::

Convert iTunes to MP3 Format I wonder if this would work for us?? Hmmm?

DoCopenhagen: Top 50 Music Videos Of 2005 I think I posted this before, but if not - you should take a look!!

Universal Hint System: Just the hints you need

Favorville : People Helping People

MSNBC - Sonar references deleted from whale report

Do you need a reminder? This is great for reminding you to pick up the milk on the way home or something.

This should make Frankie happy! People are starting to finally realize that there are good musicians putting their works into games and TV. I would really like a listing of all the songs in CSI (nevada - not the rest of them)

Happy Friday.

I wish the ignorant fucks I work with would remember this.

I may look white.
I may have an anglo last name.

But I am still Mexican.
I will always be Mexican.

And the more you put them down the more you piss me off and the more hell you are going to bring down upon your heads when I really lose my temper.

I know you don’t care, but I now have a lovely milkshake in front of me. And I am going to drink down the whole thing all by myself. This once again restores my faith in my co-workers. Specifically two of them, and I know one is nosey and is checking out my blog, but that’s okay!! I still won’t give him the password to my blocked entries!! Heee heee hee!!

So beyond my imminent gas production (remember – milkshake = lactose = gas) I am in quite a perky mood. I have to run by Mrs. Darcy’s house to pick up my camera (Judith’s house). We determined that I am Mrs. Heathcliff, and this makes total sense if you were in my Classicism and Romanticism class. Otherwise, I just sound like a fool.

I’ve noticed the Christmas carols…I wasn’t a fan of them when I was into Christmas, and the further I stray from the tradition, the more they annoy me. We will never have a tree because of the fuzzies, and because I think putting a dead tree in your house is kind of morbid. Instead I will plant a tree and keep the old industrial blasting in my car.

Did I mention that I have a nail in my tire? Not terribly happy about that, but what do you do? Apparently it’s a slow leak, but I won’t take Roja on I-4 for fear of an explosion or something. I’ve been driving near 90 mph and had a tire blow out on me and it scared the shit out of me. So, I shall be the back road queen for a bit.

So…for those of you who are living near us and are all into the holidays and shit – I would like to propose a separate gift giving/exchanging/burning thing which will happen in January. Why then? Because we are all strapped for cash trying to fulfill the dreams of our children (mine want Kongs filled with peanut butter and feathery toys with catnip) and our familiest and such and I don’t want to add to that stress. So… I propose a “thank god the holidaze is over” party. What do you think?

Oh – and there will be a gathering at my casa for Cat and Brains when they are at our casa.

Yeah – that was a damn fine milkshake. I’m a tired but very happy Grump!

So, I am acting as the lead admin today. Now before you get your panites in a knot, it doesn’t mean anyting except that I get a little more pay and a lot more headaches. And I can’t use my keyboard. I think I will yank mine from my desk and put it up here…

So, call me if you need me !

Update on the paper - I’m soooo not finished! w00t!

Away from my desk today.

I know this comes as no surprise to anyone, but I’ve been unbalanced of late. Yeah, I know, it’s a shocker. So, after much internal dialog I’ve gone through the first steps to make an appointment with a therapist, which include phone calls, speaking to four different people from my insurance company, and lots of note taking. The therapist I chose has an office close to the casa, so I can just scoot back home after the visit. I left a message with her this morning, but I left her my cell number. My cell is, of course, completely dead. YAY ME! But I will try to grab the message when I drive home. I think I have the charger in the car… I think.

Brains (my coworker whose name is actually Brian S, but I like brains better) took me out to lunch. I craved comfort food. I devoured chicken fingers, fries and a frosty. All those parts of a healthy diet that a growing girl needs. He took me out because he realized that something troubled me. The tears probably gave it away. I admit that my cruelty governs movement through the workplace. I admit that my flaws often outshine my attributes. Brains thought taking the conversation outside of work would be best. He wanted me to know that people do not understand the erratic shifts, the “unseen claws.” The conversation reaffirmed my belief that I need to do something with outside help. I felt better about my decision with a full stomach.

D’s off today, resting comfortably at home with the fuzzies. I’m gritting my teeth this morning, painfully uninterested and bothered by the consistant bullshit that swims around my feet in this place. But, it’s Monday. What can I really do?

I’ve got timesheets, lunch with D, a study group at school and other stuff going on today. Not much to say. My eyes feel heavy and I’m wearing spectacular dark circles beneath them. It shocked me this morning. I’ve not seen myself look so terrible, so exhausted by frustration, rage and inconsistant shifts.

I just need to get through this week. Two midterms and a presentation.
I’m going to go back to listening to my podcasts. They take me out of this place for a while….have a happy Monday.